Surrender
by wolfypuppypiles
Summary: "You don't need me. No one does." Lance gives himself up to the enemy to save Keith and the rest of his team.
1. Chapter 1

"Give yourself up Paladin. We know you infiltrated our ship to find your friend. Surrender and you can share a cell with him."

Keith swore and shoved Lance down behind a bench as the guards approached. They were so close. All they had to do was steal a ship and get out of there so they could blow up the galra ship with the bomb they planted. Hunk and Pidge had already busted Shiro out and were waiting on the castle ship for their red and blue team members to come back.

Lance deactivated his bayard, the heavy weapon returning to its original, small form, as he handed it to Keith.

"I'll go. You get back to the ship."

"What? What are you talking about? No, we'll take them on together and get out of here."

The blue paladin turned to him and shook his head, his face as serious as Keith had ever seen it. His voice was low and quiet.

"There's too many for us to take on by ourselves and we can't bring in back up without alerting Zarkon that we're here. The distraction that got us in the ship won't work a second time. This is our only option."

Keith's chest grew tight, he knew it was true.

"No. No, we'll find another way. You can't do this, I won't let you."

"You have to-"

Keith picked up the blue bayard and shoved it to Lance's chest.

"No. It's not happening. You aren't thinking straight, we need you to form Voltron."

Lance smiled but it held nothing but sadness. He sounded defeated and resolute and it broke Keith's heart.

"No, you don't. No one needs me, Keith. You're the best pilot, Shiro is the best fighter, Pidge and Hunk are collectively the smartest people ever, and Allura and Coran pilot the castle. Everyone has their job, this is mine."

Keith dropped the Bayard when Lance refused to take it and gripped his arms instead, fingers desperately digging into the black paladin suit between the bulky pieces of armour.

"Lance, don't do this. We need you, I need you!" He was coming dangerously close to admitting his feelings for the idiotic space pilot, and he could feel his eyes burning with the promise of tears, but all he could think about was needing to keep Lance with him. To get him back to the castle, safe.

Voices came through their helmets now, Allura and Coran asking for status updates.

"Where are you two? Shiro is safe in a healing pod. He'll be okay but you need to get back before Zarkon's ship detects us through our cloaking."

Keith gripped Lance harder, desperate.

"Lance please!" But he could see in the others face that he couldn't convince him. Lance sighed in relief at the news that Shiro was safe. He smiled at Keith as he pressed the com button.

"Keith's coming back now. I… I love you guys."

"Lance, please don't do this."

"Come out now Paladin or we will be forced to get rough with your friend."

There was so much Lance wanted to say to Keith but if he didn't go out now they'd discover the missing prisoner and find the rest of the team. It had to be now. His cheeks were already wet as he pulled off his helmet and did the same to a confused Keith. He took the others face in his hands, thumb running over the red paladins' cheek.

"I'm sorry."

Lance kissed him. Keith could taste the salt from their tears but pressed harder against Lance's mouth, hands coming up to grip the back of his neck. He never wanted to let go.

Lance broke the kiss and smiled again before jumping out from behind the table and putting his hands up.

"I'm here. I surrender."

Keith could do nothing but sit and watch as the galra soldiers grabbed Lance, pulling his hands behind his back and shoving him towards the door. Keith wanted to kill every last one of them but Lance had been right, there were too many and he couldn't endanger the lives of everyone on his team for just one member. As much as he wanted to.

Voices came, too many, from his and Lance's discarded helmets and he picked up the blue one to hear what was being said.

"What happened?"

"What was Lance talking about?"

"You have to get out right now!"

Keith gripped the helmet tighter and clenched his eyes shut against his tears.

"He's…he's gone."


	2. Chapter 2

Keith slumped in his seat as he was barraged with questions. He held Lance's helmet in his lap and kept his eyes fixed on it as he answered.

"Why did he leave?"

"Why didn't you stop him?"

"Why didn't you fight them off?"

Keith sighed. "There were too many guards. Lance insisted we didn't need him, that saving me was his job. Then he…"

He could still feel the way Lance took his face in his hands. The gentle sweep of his thumb over Keith's cheek. And the taste of Lance in his mouth. His lips had been as soft as Keith had imagined, and now he felt cold without him.

Hunk knelt down beside him when Keith didn't finish his sentence.

"Keith?"

The red paladin sighed and closed his eyes.

"Then he left. He gave himself up so that the guards wouldn't find me. I couldn't stop him without blowing the whole operation. They would have captured both of us and then found the rest of you. He knew that. He sacrificed himself to get us out."

Allura grumbled. "He was being reckless."

Keith jumped to his feet, hands clenching into fists as his misery turned to rage in an instant.

"He was being a hero! A Paladin! It was the only thing he could do!"

Allura shot him an apologetic look

Keith sat slumped in his seat as he was barraged with questions. He held lances helmet in his lap and kept his eyes fixed on it as he answered.

"Of course, I just meant this puts us in the same position as it did before. We need all five paladins to form Voltron and we only have four."

Keith was shaking with anger and was glad for it, the hot anger burned his face and dried the tears from his eyes.

"He's not just a paladin. He's lance and he's our friend. He did this for all of us! For you!"

He couldn't stand to look at their pitying stares. They didn't know lance like he did.

Lance hadn't been his biggest fan when they first found the lions, but fighting alien battles in space tended to form bonds quickly. Once Shiro went missing all the paladins were worried and without a leader. Keith had found lance wandering the castle one night, when he couldn't sleep either, and had followed him to the pool.

He's watched from a distance for a bit, not wanting to disturb his team mate, and had seen lance crouch by the pool and dip his feet in, staring at the blue water with sad eyes.

Keith had watched silently until his hand slipped on the wall and made a noise. Lance had seen him but didn't say anything, just watched him as he came out and awkwardly took a seat beside him.

"Couldn't sleep?"

Lance shook his head and looked back at the water. He's been so sad and quiet, not like his usual self at all. Keith suddenly felt closer to him, as if he was being allowed to see something rare and private.

"Do you think Shiro is okay?"

Keith shrugged and dipped his feet into the water beside lance's. The water was warm and smooth, making Keith feel more relaxed than he had all day.

"I don't know. He's like a big brother to me and... I keep losing him."

Lance had looked over at Keith with such awe, surprised that Keith had been honest with him with such emotions. Keith had kept his eyes on the water but felt his face warm a little when lance shifted closer to him.

They'd talked a little more that night, about lances family and how much they missed home. And after the words ran out they just sat in silence together.

After that they'd been more closely linked during battle and often teamed up on missions.

There was more to lance than his over the top flirting and never ending confidence. In fact, those things were a mask he used to shelter himself from his pain and homesickness. And the thought that he wasn't a part of the team.

Keith couldn't listen to his team talk about lance as if his sacrifice was selfishness. He stormed out and headed straight to Shiro' healing pod.

He sat on the step, in front of the pod, holding lances helmet and staring down at it as he attempted to calm his temper. He desperately wished Shiro was awake to talk to. He always gave good advice.

"I'm glad your back."

Shiro didn't answer of course but he wouldn't be in long. Most of the damage done had been psychological.

Keith continued talking to the empty room, finding it to be a relief after keeping it all trapped in his head for so long.

"I'm sorry we didn't get you back sooner, and I'm sorry I let lance go. Couldn't stop him. But I tried. I don't... I don't know what to do, Shiro. He kissed me. And I kissed him back. But now he's gone and all I have is his helmet."

'And the imprint of his lips on mine.'

He'd already lost his parents, and Shiro was always being taken from him. And now lance. It seemed as if he was cursed to lose anyone close to him.

What use was being a paladin if you couldn't save anyone you loved?

Hunk came in then, quietly taking a seat beside Keith.

"I'm worried about him too. He's my best friend, but we'll find him. We'll get him back just like we did with Shiro. Right?"

Keith nodded and kept his eyes on the helmet.

Hunk looked between the Keith and the piece of armour.

"Did he tell you how he felt before he-?"

Keith's head snapped up to look at the yellow paladin. When he saw nothing but quiet interest he softened, cheeks turning red.

"He... kissed me."

Hunk nodded and smiled, nudging his shoulder against Keith's.

"Did you kiss him back?"

Keith managed a smile before he grew sad again and hugged lances helmet to his chest.

"Yeah. Why didn't he say anything before? Why did he have to wait till three seconds before he gave himself up to the enemy?"

Hunk sighed.

"Lance doesn't really share much. He fakes being confident and stuff around everyone but he's actually kinda shy. He didn't know if you felt the same way."

Keith frowned, feeling tears prick his eyes.

"Well he could have just asked me!"

Hunk patted him on the back, his big paw of a hand was warm and comforting and Keith found himself leaning towards the guy as he was pulled into a hug.

"It'll be okay buddy. He'll come back and you can go on a date. I'll make spaghetti. Or the alien equivalent."

Keith huffed out a laugh.

"Thanks hunk."

Keith leant into Hunk and let the yellow paladin hold him as they both sat and thought about their team members.

After learning that all matter in the universe was connected, Keith had felt more at home with team Voltron. But now Lance was missing, a piece of him was gone and Keith felt it like a physical wound.

He would go to the ends of the galaxy to get Lance back.


	3. Chapter 3

It took three weeks to save Lance.

Allura had created a wormhole to take them half way across the Galaxy, as soon as Keith made it on board, and the team were worried about being able to save their friend in time.

"Do you think they'll hurt him?"

Shiro hadn't wanted to worry the others, they were looking at him as if begging him to give them good news. But all he had was a sigh.

"They'll probably try and get information out of him. Which he won't have because there's no way for him to know where we are. We'll find him guys, we'll get him back."

Keith was still holding Lance's helmet, as if it was the most precious thing in the universe. To him, it was close. He didn't look up as he spoke, voice quiet.

"They won't have any reason to keep him alive, if he doesn't have information. He can't tell them anything they don't already know. Zarkon used to Pilot the black lion, he knows everything about it."

Shiro came over and laid a hand on Keith's shoulder, trying to be comforting.

"Maybe they'll use him to get to us, to lure us in. They'd have to keep him alive for that."

Hunk piped up, sounding as hopeful as he could while talking about his missing best friend.

"Or maybe they'll use him as a fighter like Shiro?"

Keith scowled. "And cut off his arm? Make him a weapon? Lance doesn't like hurting people, and hand to hand combat isn't his skill set, he'll be killed."

Shiro looked a little hurt at the comment of his arm, and took his metal hand off the red paladin.

"We'll find him. And whatever state we find him in, it'll be okay. You all saved me, we'll save him too."

Keith sniffed, looking like we was going to cry, when Allura called out.

"I'm sorry, Paladins but the rescue mission is going to have to wait just for a little while. We've received an urgent distress call from a nearby planet."

Keith wanted to object, he wanted to tell them that Lance was their priority. But being the defenders of the universe meant making hard decisions and putting others needs before your own. These people had been imprisoned for ten thousand years, and they needed help now. Keith just had to hope Lance would be okay until they rescued him.

It wasn't a long fight, they didn't even need to form Voltron. The planet wasn't large and so it hadn't needed such heavy protection as other planets had, which made freeing the population almost easy. But Keith had never been so distracted. He felt Lance's absence like a physical hole in him, and knew the others felt the same way.

Flying together and fighting together, without Lance, felt incomplete.

Once the planet was free, the team went back to the ship, finding Coran and Allura waiting for them with solemn expressions.

"We've picked up a transmission from the planet you've just saved. It's from Zarkon's ship."

Shiro looked worried, tensing up as if expecting an attack.

"Does he know where we are?"

Allura quickly shook her head, gaze focussed on the floor. Keith didn't like how this was going.

"No, at least I don't think so. It's being broadcast anywhere the Galra have taken over, and even some planets they haven't. It's… it's Lance. You may not want to watch."

Keith swallowed. Even Coran was looking grim and that was never a good sign.

"Play it."

Allura looked to Shiro, who nodded, before tapping her screen. A video lit up half the room and Keith felt as if he couldn't breathe. It was a video of Lance being questioned by one of the Galra commanders. He was sitting in a chair, hands tied behind his back, as the Galra circled him.

"Where are the rest of your team?"

Lance sighed tiredly as if he'd been asked that before. Keith came closer to the screen, reaching out a hand as if to touch him. There were already bruises spread across the blue paladin's cheek.

"I don't know, they could be anywhere by now."

The commander kept pacing, tone growing more impatient with each question.

"Is there any way to track Voltron or the Castle which you all reside on?"

"I'm not going to tell you anything, you know that. I don't even know how any of that stuff works, I just shoot what I'm told to."

"What is Voltron's biggest weakness?"

"Well I'd say the colour coordination probably. I mean, if Pidge is the one that activates the shield why is it red? Is it to match the sword? Cause that's Keith's but if Pidge activates the shield, then it should be green, right?"

The commander threw a hand towards Lance, striking him across the face with enough force to snap his head to the side. The team gasped in synchronized shock and Pidge whimpered as Lance winced, squeezing his eyes tight against the pain. Coran let out a sad sigh.

"Oh, number three."

The Galra bent to meet his eyes with Lance's once he finally opened them again. His voice was quieter but twice as threatening and Keith could see Lance's hands shaking behind him. The Galra was massive compared to Lance, and he knew how hard they could hit. Allura had been right, he didn't want to see this. But he had to.

"What is Voltron's biggest weakness?"

Lance smiled but it held no joy, only mild amusement to cover his overwhelming despair, and Keith knew what he was going to say.

"I am."

The commander saw this as another mockery and growled, gripping Lance's hair in one huge hand, pulling Lance's head back so that his bare neck was exposed and vulnerable. He let out a small laugh as the commander gripped him.

"Now they can replace me, they probably already have. Voltron will be stronger than before and you'll all lose to a group of kids in cat robots."

The Galra shoved Lance's head back a little in frustration before letting go and pacing the room again.

Lance sighed and pursed his lips as though he were thinking hard.

"Well, Shiro isn't really a kid. He's more like a dad, but the fun kind. So, you'll be beaten by the ultimate space dad and his adopted kids. Plus, their crazy Uncle Coran and the Princess."

Shiro would have smiled at Lance's words if the kid wasn't speaking through a cut lip.

Lance's smile faded as he lowered his head to look at the floor.

"And whoever they get to replace me, I guess."

The commander grew frustrated and gestured to one of the guards.

"He's useless. Throw him in a cell but keep those cuffs on, we don't want him getting any ideas about breaking out. And take that armour off, he won't be needing it."

Lance looked up in fear as the guard approached, grabbing him from the chair and throwing him towards a cell before following him in. Lance landed heavily on his side, grunting in pain as he hit the hard floor, before desperately scrambling away from the guard.

"No, stop. Leave me alone."

The guard took no notice of him and began prying the armour off Lance's body, revealing the black paladin suit underneath. The guard was rough and Hunk flinched every time one of the pieces dug into his best friend's skin before being pried free. Finally, Lance was shoved to the back of the cell and left there, locked in the dim cage where he lay, curled on the floor.

The commanders voice came again, deep and pleased.

"I'll be back, Paladin. And I will get answers from you. Even if I have to crack open that head to get them."

They could hear doors slamming, making Lance flinch, as he was left alone in his cell.

Keith couldn't take his eyes off his team mate, although he was more than that, now wasn't he? He could hear Hunk crying softly as his friend lay crumpled on the ground, and Keith heard Pidge walk over and take his hand.

Keith felt as if he couldn't breathe, wouldn't, until Lance was back. And then he saw Lance's shoulders shake. Small tremors as he pressed his face to the ground and cried.

Allura shut off the screen as the transmission ended, face full of concern for her team as she turned to them.

"I'm so sorry-"

Keith left. He couldn't stand there and watch Lance be tortured by those monsters. They needed to save him.


	4. Chapter 4

Lance didn't stay on the floor for long. He had a terrible headache and what he thought might possibly be whiplash from being hit so many times by that galra commander but his mama didn't raise no quitter.

He allowed himself to wallow in his misery for a little bit (he wasn't even 18 yet and had already been taken as a prisoner of war, he figured he was entitled to a pity party) before getting back on his feet and searching for a way out.

His hands were still tied behind his back and his shoulder had been badly jarred when he was thrown on the floor, and he groaned in pain as he stood.

He couldn't break out of the cell, he knew that much, but if there was any way of getting out or causing the galra trouble he'd find it.

It was so dark in the cell, it would be so much easier if he could see. And it was freezing. He pulled at his cuffs, testing how much give he had but they seemed to tighten the more he pulled and soon they were so tight he couldn't even wiggle his fingers.

He sighed in frustration. He didn't have the engineering or technical abilities like hunk and pidge, and even Keith and Shiro could probably break out. He smiled at the thought of Allura morphing into something so big her size spilt the cage from the inside out.

He didn't know how to get out.

Lance couldn't say he wasn't scared, in fact he was terrified, but maybe his team would come for him. Maybe.

For now, he'd hide behind the mask he's worn so long. The overconfident, obnoxious idiot, and he wouldn't give the Galra shit.

When the commander came back, Lance raised his chin and smirked.

"Back again! That was quick, did you miss me?"

The purple giant looked amused as he opened the door and grabbed the Paladin by the collar of his paladin suit, dragging him over to the metal chair again and sitting him down, before leaning down and smirking into Lance's eyes.

"This is your last chance to tell us what you know. After that, things will have to get…unpleasant."

Lance swallowed his fear and shrugged.

"Well, I know you aren't supposed to eat right before bed but who actually follows that rule, right? Pancakes always taste better at midnight and-"

The commander growled and slammed a fist into Lance's stomach, cutting off his words along with his airflow. He coughed and spluttered, trying to regain his breath, as the Galra opened the doors to usher in a creepy looking purple person wearing a robe.

"You should be honoured, Hagar sent this druid personally. Remember when I said I'd crack that head open to get the secrets inside? Let's try it."

Lance looked fearfully at the druid quickly approaching him with those horrible, bony fingers. He squirmed a little in his seat, unsure what was about to happen. The druid stopped about a meter in front of him, hands raised in front of them. A raspy voice came from under the hood, quiet and barely there, but Lance could feel the words in his ear as if spoken directly against his skull.

"Open your mind and this will be painless."

Lance shook his head and the commander smiled.

The druid began muttering things, nothing Lance had ever heard, and their horrible fingers twisted and curled as the air seemed to shimmer and warp around them. Suddenly, it felt as if those fingers were wrapped around his mind, squeezing, and probing as nails dug into the soft tissue. It was like an instant migraine and Lance blinked in surprise as the air in front of the druid shivered with colour.

His thoughts, his memories, began to appear in the air. Flickering blurred images hovered there and Lance quickly sealed his mind before they could see anything clearly. It was like the opposite of the mind link that all the Paladins shared. Instead of being open he would be a locked safe and the Galra would have nothing.

But the druid simply titled their head slightly and pulled harder, tearing at Lance's mind and ripping the memories from him by force.

The air shimmered again, this time with a clear image of Voltron.

Lance struggled in the chair but it was like he was frozen. His teeth clenched hard and he forced another image into his head. The air swirled with colours before settling on a table full of food, hot and waiting for him. The druid squeezed his mind harder, but Lance only laughed as music drifted into the room, directly from his head.

It was the Macarena, the same annoying ass song that got stuck in his head during his exams at the garrison. Thank god he had it now.

The commander surged forward and took Lance's shoulders, shaking him hard enough to rattle his head on his neck.

"Show us the secrets of Voltron!"

Lance gave nothing but more food and a louder chorus of the most annoying song in the universe, making the Galra angry enough to throw a clenched fist towards the paladin's face.

Lance grunted in pain and the memories floating in the air turned abruptly to black.

…..

Keith had been furious after the first transmission, shaking with rage and the need to punch something. He went to the training deck and threw himself into a fight.

Allura had said a rescue mission for Lance was out of the question until they had a decent plan. Keith didn't want a plan he wanted Lance back.

But Shiro had agreed with the princess and so Keith yelled in rage as he swung himself into the path of the fighting drone once again. His anger was making him reckless and sloppy but he revelled in the pain of the drone's metal hitting his unprotected skin, the screaming of his muscles as he pushed himself further.

He was covered in sweat and shaking with excursion by the time Pidge came sprinting into the room.

"Keith, there's… there's another video."

Shiro had started shivering when the druid came on screen. He almost couldn't look at it. His voice was weak as he tried to explain.

"They used one when they had me. They didn't get much. My mind was too scrambled already, from the flashbacks and memory gaps, that they couldn't get anything useful. But it's the worst kind of torture. You can't… you can't stop that sort of thing. They'll rip his thoughts out of his head. He won't be able to hold them off for long."

They all watched, horrified as Lance struggled against the druid, body jerking in the chair as his breaths grew laboured and too fast.

When the commander hit him, knocking him out, the images finally stopped and the druid's hands lowered.

"He must be awake for me to retrieve his memories. Keep him weak, it'll give me greater access to what we want."

It left as the commander nodded. Lance was slumped in his chair, unconscious and the commander looked disappointed as he took the paladin's limp body from the chair and threw him into his cell.

The next day when the druid was brought in Lance knew what he was in for. The commander was impatient for answers and hadn't allowed Lance to get any sleep, sending water spraying into his cell every time he managed to doze off. The video being sent to every available screen in the galaxy was now non-stop and his team had been watching him closely all night.

Lance was dragged back to the chair, hair wet and dripping in front of his eyes as he shivered slightly, arms still pulled painfully behind his back. He raised his eyes to the commander but had lost any trace of humour.

"I don't know anything useful. Shiro keeps all the plans secret, I-" This was a lie and the commander knew it, he punched Lance again and the blue paladin whimpered as his already battered face was struck again.

The druid came forward and Lance's breath hitched.

"Please, don't."

Hands raised and the air shimmered, the magic was stronger this time and Lance let out a strangled cry as those claws dug into his mind, tearing at his memories. This time the air flickered with images of his family, a woman with the same eyes as Lance and a man with the same smile. Smaller versions of Lance and older kids with the same lanky limbs. Lance watched his memories play out and kicked in the chair.

"No, Mama!"

The commander grunted, pleased they were finally getting somewhere but still not seeing what he wanted.

"Look deeper."

The druid twisted their fingers, reaching.

"These memories are dear to him, I am trying to locate the ones that are most important but they are also the hardest to manipulate."

The druid pulled harder and Lance screamed. The air shimmered again. More images of his mother, holding him as he cried and talking in soft Spanish.

"Siempre te amaré. No importa quien seas con. Tú eres mi hijo, eres perfecta."

Lance jerked in the chair again as another memory was torn free. The first time he'd kissed a boy and he realized he felt the same way about boys as he did about girls. And the first time he knew what it was called.

All his memories of his family, his mother, his younger siblings, it was all being torn free and he couldn't protect them. The druid was tearing his brain in half and Lance couldn't stop it, all he could do was push something else to the front of his mind to distract.

He tried to think of something else, his favourite food or songs that he liked, even that one teacher at the garrison that always picked on him in class, but all that came to his searing brain was the one person that had always managed to take up his concentration so completely.

The air changed again and this time it was red. Keith's smile when he thought no one was looking, his honest eyes and the way they seemed to look right through to Lance's soul, the way the water of the pool had reflected so prettily on Keith's face and how much Lance had wanted to kiss him.

Lance fought against the grip on his mind but the fingers dug in so deep he thought they might never let go.

It was agony, and when it finally stopped he was left gasping and shaking in his chair.

The druid scowled at him.

"We must stop for now."

The commander was not happy about this.

"He's weak! It was working! Keep going, we need answers about-"

"If we are too reckless with his mind it will break and we will gain nothing."

The Galra looked down at the blue paladin as he picked him up from the chair and dragged the shaking boy back to his cell.

"Pathetic."

Shiro had wanted everyone to leave when the memories of Lance's first boyfriend came out, but Keith had been rooted to the spot when it changed to him. Lance had so many memories of his, all tinged with that same soft longing that Keith felt every time he thought of the obnoxious blue Paladin.


	5. Chapter 5

Lance curled into a ball on the floor of his cell, as much as he could with his, now numb, hands still tied. His face was throbbing as was his head and he was still shivering from both cold and the pain of having his brain clawed at. He choked on a sob at the thought of the Galra seeing his family, knowing their names and everything about them.

His voice was weak and cracked in several places but the Spanish brought him comfort when nothing else would.

"Yo soy mamá lo siento. Lo intenté. He intentado mucho pero no soy lo suficientemente fuerte. Y me duele tan malo que no sé si puedo detenerlos. Voy a perder y nunca los veré otra vez. Lo siento, que no mantengo mi promesa de volver a usted. Yo soy mamá lo siento.

Quise venir en casa pero tuvo que salvar el universo. Su hijo 's madre de un héroe. O por lo menos."

 _I'm so sorry mamá. I tried. I tried really hard but I'm not strong enough. And it hurts so bad I don't know if I can stop them. I'm going to lose and I'll never see you again. I'm sorry I didn't keep my promise to come back to you. I'm so sorry mamá._

 _I wanted to come home but I had to save the universe. Your son's a hero mamá. Or at least he was._

Lance fell asleep before the tears dried on his face.

The Commander let Lance sleep for one blessed hour before he woke him again. Lance was so sore and exhausted he screamed out in frustration, before lying on the floor and running through Garrison drills to keep his mind occupied. The headache upgraded to a migraine and he no longer knew how long he'd been a prisoner for.

The druid came every day and tore new memories out of his head. Lance tried to keep them to comforting pieces of his childhood that the Galra couldn't use. Games he made up with his little brother when they were bored in church. The way his dad kissed his mother on the cheek every night he got home from work, and the way his mum swore in Spanish when she got particularly mad. He missed them all so much and he didn't want to give them to the Galra but they were all that stopped the druid from finding information about Voltron.

It wasn't until the commander brought out the taser that they got any useful secrets from him.

Lance scrambled in his chair, trying to get as far away from the flickering energy as possible, but the commander laughed as he pressed the current to Lance's chest. His body arched with the shock and his mind went white, open as a book for the druid to page through. It lasted only as long as the current ran through his body, before Lance slumped again and put his wall of childhood memories back up.

So far, he'd been lucky, and the druid had only managed to gain small pieces of his memory, just flashes of training sessions and battles, but the commander was pleased.

"We now know the small green friend of yours favours her right and slows significantly when struck. This will be useful in battle. Your team will know this and leave you here as a traitor. Give up the rest of your memories or die protecting them."

Lance was still struggling for breath as he raised his glassy eyes to the Galra.

"I… won't ever…give them up."

The druid stepped forward again, stroking a cold finger down Lance's cheek, the claw like nail almost wanting to cut through his skin.

"Your mind will break if you continue to resist. Comply and you will be able to rest. Let it end."

Lance shook his head though his vision blurred further.

"You can crack my head enough times to make an omelette and I still won't give you what you want."

The druid reminded the commander that they needed his mind intact to gain information but the Galra didn't seem to care, ordering another round of torture on the already exhausted Paladin.

Not one eye in the castle-ship was dry as another scream was dragged out of Lance. His head was thrown back as his already worn out throat was damaged further and his memories played out in the air like a watery television screen.

But they'd been at it so long his memories were becoming broken, half formed dreams. They flickered and tore and he became more confused after each session. Soon, he wasn't even speaking English anymore.

Keith sat by the screen and held Hunks hand as they watched Lance lay on the floor of his cell, unfocussed eyes blinking up at the ceiling as he mumbled in his first language.

"What's he saying?"

Hunk sniffed and listened for a moment before sobbing again.

"He's talking to his Mama. Most of it doesn't make sense. I don't think he knows where he is."

Shiro had been unable to watch the video without his own mind throwing flashbacks at him and banned Pidge from watching something so horrible.

Keith wiped at his eyes and turned back to Allura who was going over battle plans with Coran.

"We have to get him out! He won't last much longer, he's barely still there. We have to help him!"

Allura turned with a grim expression but it held more hope than any of them had felt in weeks.

"I may have something resembling a plan. With Pidge and Hunks help we may just be able to pull it off. But yes, we should hurry."


	6. Chapter 6

Lance watched the ceiling swirl above him as he was dragged across the floor. Something had his foot in a tight grip but he was too tired to kick them away. It was probably Mateo waking him up for Mama, but the seven-year-old wasn't strong enough, surely. Maybe Izzy was helping. Lance smiled at the thought. Izzy was five and often snuck into Lance's bed when she didn't want to sleep alone. He missed them all so much.

Then suddenly the room tipped and Lance was in a chair. He didn't like this chair although he wasn't sure why.

"There is nothing left to gain from him. Whatever I pull from his mind will be as useless as the rest."

Lance didn't like that voice either, he shivered in his chair as another, deeper one, answered.

"It no longer matters; his team is coming for him."

"Will we resist them?"

"No, they can have him. Let's return the Paladin to his rightful place. He'll be useless and they will be weak as they try to help their broken team mate. Continue with his memory, we no longer need information, just make sure they will get none."

Lance moaned as his head grew tight, images and light flickering through his head like a strobe light of memories, and his consciousness drifted.

…

Keith had spent three weeks waiting to get Lance back, three weeks watching him being tortured and begging him to hold on till they got there. And they were finally going to rescue him.

The Paladins raced to their lions, all eager to see their team mate returned. Everyone had a job to do, but Keith could only focus on their main objective. He was to get inside the ship and locate Lance, free him and bring him to the castle. He had insisted it be him to find Lance under the pretence that his lion was the fastest and would be the only one able to get inside while the others distracted the galra. Everyone knew that Pidge would be better suited to the task due to the fact that her lion was equipped with cloaking, but they knew what the blue paladin meant to Keith and kept quiet.

The plan went well, the Galra easily distracted as Keith went inside. It seemed too easy, like it could be a trap, but Keith didn't hesitate as he sought out Lance's cell. He felt as if his heart was trying to leap out of his chest with each step closer he got to Lance.

Pidge was yelling out directions from the system she hacked, leading Keith to their friend.

"Okay now two more lefts and then go to the third door on the right. There's two guards you'll need to take out but Lance should be in that cell."

Keith found himself smiling as he raced towards the door, fighting past the two sentries posted at the door. The two gave up a fight but dropped to the floor as heavy as rocks when Keith bested them. And finally, he had found Lance.

The door opened, with Pidges help, and Keith stepped inside. His steps faltered as he saw the chair that Lance had been put in so many times, and his breaths froze in his chest as he saw the cell. It was dark and cold but Keith could make out a slumped form in the shadows.

"Lance."

Hunk's worried voice came over the coms, hurried and panting from battle.

"Have you got him? Is he okay?"

Keith couldn't answer. His feet felt heavy as lead as he stepped towards the bars, pushing open the door that Pidge had unlocked.

The red Paladin pulled his helmet off as he crept over to Lance. He could hear his muttering as he approached, clumsy, tired words that fell over themselves and tangled in Lance's mouth. Some were half formed and although Keith did not speak Spanish he knew none of it made sense.

He knelt next to the boy, heart thrumming too fast as he took him in. There were slowly healing bruises, and newer ones, scattered across whatever exposed skin Keith could see. The colours blended and bloomed like the galaxies that Lance loved so much and Keith had never seen something so ugly look so beautiful but he supposed he only loved them because they were part of Lance.

He had finally found him.

The pilot was laying half curled on the damp floor, hair stuck to his forehead in sweaty loops, eyes unfocussed and half lidded.

Keith's hands fluttered for a moment before he knelt, unsure of where to touch in case he hurt the paladin further.

"Lance? Can you hear me?"

The team called to them from Keith's helmet but he left it on the ground as he took out his bayard and cut the ropes tying Lance's hands behind his back. Keith swore as he pulled those trembling limbs forward to Lance's chest. His wrists were raw and bloodied, heavy bruising ringing them like ink and Lance groaned as he was moved.

"Detener."

 _Stop._

Keith leant a little closer and carefully brushed his hands over Lance's forehead, brushing the hair from his face and pressing his hands to his skin.

"It's okay, Lance. I'm taking you home." He sighed "You're too warm."

Lance's head rolled a little as Keith trailed the back of his hand down the boy's cheek, giving what little comfort he could. Keith continued his assessment of his team mate, calling out to his helmet to inform the team of their friend's condition.

"Fever, lacerations and bruising to the face and wrists, about…three, four broken ribs, possible internal bleeding though we won't know till we get this suit off. I don't think he's gonna be walking out of here. We need a stretcher."

Hunk volunteered and could be heard racing to their location as Shiro spoke in a low, calm tone.

"Helps coming. How is he? Is he awake?"

Keith sighed as Lance twitched, eyes rolling all over the place but never landing on him.

"Yeah, but he's… not really here."

Keith's face felt hot with rage as he clenched his fist and pressed his knuckles to the floor. He needed to focus. He could destroy the ones that did this later, right now he needed to save Lance.

He jumped in fright when Hunk sprinted through the door, stretcher in hand. Keith raised his bayard, ready to fight off more Galra before realizing who it was and lowering it again with a sigh.

Hunk's eyes filled with tears as soon as he saw his best friend, face crumpling in sorrow before he sniffed and focused, coming to kneel beside his two team mates and taking Lance's hand in his with a gentleness Keith thought people reserved for new born babies.

Hunk pulled bandages from his pockets and wrapped them hastily around the worst cuts. Keith felt sick as blood stained Hunk's fingers. The yellow paladin was talking quietly to his friend, pausing only to brush Lance's hair back with a tenderness that betrayed his brotherly love for his team mate.

"We'll get you all patched up, Lance, it'll be okay. It's a good thing we payed attention during the first aid classes at the garrison huh? You fell asleep in the middle of a speech about infectious diseases while I was trying not to puke. I missed you, buddy."

Lance groaned a little as Hunk picked him up with that same gentleness, holding him to his chest in a hug before laying him on the stretcher and nodding to Keith. They each took an end and carried him out, meeting Shiro in the hall where he could cover them as they carried Lance. His face went white when he saw the boy, but he took a breath and nodded to the others.

"Let's get him home."

…..

Lance was taken straight to the healing pods, and Keith could feel the ache in his arms from how badly he wanted to hold Lance. But there was no time, some of Lance's wounds were infected and his skin burned with fever. He groaned every time he was moved.

Pidge gad started crying when she saw him, Allura's hands coming to her mouth in shock at the sight of her paladin ac Coran prepared the healing pod.

Shiro placed Lance's armour on one of the work tables, looking down at them instead of the battered kid behind him.

"We grabbed his armour on the way out, I don't think he's going to be wearing it for a while."

Allura came and took his hand, comforting Shiro with a quiet touch. Keith couldn't hold Lance but he had to do something.

The poor teenager was whimpering as Hunk and Coran tried to put him in the pod, it was colder than his old cell and the hissing of the machine scared him. Keith carefully took Lance's hand in his, pressing their palms together and feeling the heat of his skin. He felt the red heat of embarrassment in his cheeks but ignored it as he rubbed his thumb over the back of Lance's hand.

"It's okay. You're home, now. We got you. Shhhh Lance, everything's okay."

His voice was the softest that anyone had ever heard it, and amazingly Lance settled in the pod, laying back and sighing as he drifted further from consciousness. His fingers curled around Keith's hand for a moment before going lax again. It could have been just a reaction, just Lance squeezing back whatever squeezed him, but Keith could have sworn Lance knew it was him. It felt…more.

Coran put a hand on his shoulder, voice low as he understood what he was asking of Keith.

"It's ready."

 _You have to let go of him now._

Keith rubbed his thumb over Lance's too hot skin once more before letting go and watching that cool mist settle over the blue paladin. He looked almost peaceful under all the bruises and for a tick Keith could imagine he was only sleeping.

He had only just let go of Lance but god, his hands ached with the need to hold him again.

"Hurry up and get better, okay? We missed you."


	7. Chapter 7

(Thank you sooo much for the support with this I appreciate it so much sorry its not very good. my wisdom teeth are coming in and its extremely painful so im on heavy pain killers and its making my brian all fuzzy so sorry for any mistakes and also i dont speak spanish so i had to use a trasnlater. feel free to correct it if you know better than i do anyway love you gutys i hipe you like it)

Despite how peaceful he looked going in, Lance's time in the healing pod was far from restful. The Paladins were all camped outside the pod, not wanting to leave their team mate after spending so long waiting for him to get back. And all through the healing process, Lance would shift and mumble, begging someone to stop. Coran looked sadly at the readings on his computer screen.

"His time with the druid mixed up his memories, they're fighting for control and trying to find order. The healing pod will only heal his body, not his mind. He won't be in for long."

When Lance did come out, the team was waiting for him. Hunk stood with a blanket, arms open wide to catch him as he fell from the machine. The yellow paladin held the boy against his chest as Shiro hastily wrapped the blanket around him, calling to him as the rest of the team crowded around, trying to see.

"Lance? Can you hear me buddy?"

Lance groaned in Hunk's hold, clumsily moving around as he mumbled a few jumbled words.

Shiro's face fell a little. "Lance, come on. Open your eyes, say something."

They all watched carefully as Lance's eyelids flickered, Keith holding his breath until he got to see those bright eyes again. God, how he'd missed them.

Tired eyelids opened to those familiar oceans of blue, and a smile came to Shiro's face, before it froze in confusion. Lance wasn't looking at anyone, his eyes rolled and blinked all over the place, never landing on one spot for long, but it was clear he didn't know where he was. He didn't see them.

Hunk adjusted his hold on his friend and smoothed Lance's hair back before pulling the blanket tighter around him.

"It'll be okay, he's just confused. All his memories got mixed up, right? We can help."

Keith sat eagerly forward, hands itching to touch Lance but settling for resting his hand on Hunks shoulder instead.

"How? I don't even think he can hear us right now."

Hunk smiled down at Lance, pleased to be able to help the boy that was so much like a brother to him.

"We can use the mind melding helmets to try and sort out his memories, put them back where they belong. Or at least make him feel a little better, help him focus on what's happening right now."

Coran pulled excitedly at his moustache.

"Brilliant! Good thinking number two. Better have just one or two people do it at once though, he's got enough going on in his little melon as it is, we don't want to add too much."

Shiro looked as if he was ready to speak when Allura placed a hand on his shoulder.

"These memories of his may be violent, and you have already been through the same torture as Lance. I think it best you don't share your mind with him."

Shiro looked ashamed but tried to cover it by squaring his shoulders and nodding. He was the leader, the eldest, and these kids had already been through so much. He didn't think it fair that they had been so scarred already.

"Okay. Hunk and Keith then, you do it. You're closer to him, and he'll get the most comfort from your thoughts."

Keith's chest ballooned with joy as he nodded. He had wanted to anyway but wasn't sure if Pidge would instead since they knew each other longer than he did Keith.

Hunk stood from the floor, carefully adjusting his hold on Lance as he carried him out. The blue paladin's eyes watched the ceiling as he mumbled nonsense, hands pawing at Hunk's chest and occasionally gripping his shirt. He was scared, unsure of what was happening, but Hunk just held him close and kept talking to him.

"I'm really glad your back cause that floor is not that comfortable to sleep on and Pidge kicks really hard in her sleep. I think I have bruises from where she booted me. Oh, and Shiro has nightmares. He stayed for the first night outside your healing pod but the rest he just stayed while he was awake. I don't think he wanted us to know about his bad dreams.

And Keith's been really sad ever since you left. And I can tell he really wants to hold your hand right now but I think he's nervous."

Keith's head snapped up from where he was staring at Lance. Hunk smiled kindly at him.

"You can hold his hand if you want, Keith. He'd probably really like it."

Hunk carried Lance into the kitchen, grabbing food packs and little bags with straws that held the space equivalent of pureed fruit. It was like food goo but sweeter. He came to sit on the couch, Lance in his lap as Keith sat hesitantly beside them, taking the blue paladins hand in his as Hunk attempted to feed him the pouches.

Lance's hand was still chilly from the pod and Keith used both hands to rub some warmth into the skin. His long fingers curled and twitched as Lance huffed and groaned in pain and confusion.

Pidge came in with the helmets, and Keith almost let go of Lances hand, embarrassed, but Hunk put his hand over theirs Pidge spoke.

"Shiro said you should be careful, if his memories are anything like his, they'll be…intense."

Hunk nodded as he accepted the helmet, carefully slipping Lance's on.

Pidge watched carefully as she turned the helmets on, flinching as Hunk immediately jumped, gasping.

"Ow! His memories are hitting me, ugh. Lance, buddy concentrate on my voice."

Hunk's head felt as if someone were punching his brain, Lance's memories being fired at him in bits of broken flashes. Some were more pleasant than others, but Hunk understood why Lance was so out of it now. If that's what he was experiencing it was no wonder he was confused.

He shivered hard as images of the cell slammed against his skull, the cold, the water coming down to wake him up before he'd made a dent in his exhaustion. Then those awful claws of the druid wrapping around his mind, digging in and making him bleed memories.

He was groaning in sync with Lance and Keith and Pidge watched worriedly on.

"Hunk, concentrate on one memory. Just one moment that he will remember. Try to pick a nice one."

Hunk clenched his eyes shut, concentrating on one memory, taking it, and making it as clear as he could before he pressed it to Lance.

It was one of Hunks favourite moments with Lance. They had been having a tough week and Lance was missing home. He had grown up speaking Spanish and only learnt English at age five, but no one at the garrison spoke Spanish, or at least they didn't speak Spanish to him.

Hunk knew how much he missed it and secretly started learning the language to surprise his roommate. Lance had a particular song that he loved to sing and Hunk put special attention into learning it for him. He finally revealed his special project after Lance had had a particularly hard day, and began singing while the boy was studying.

Hunk sang Besame mucho, a little nervously, but smiled when Lance's head snapped up from his books, leaping from the bed sending his papers flying everywhere. Lance ran over, amazed as Hunk belted out the love song he'd learnt. Then, to Hunks surprise, Lance started to cry.

His blue eyes filled with tears but he was smiling as he sang along. Hunk was worried he'd done something wrong. He tested out some of the Spanish he'd learnt.

"¿Qué pasa?"

 _What's wrong?_

Lance laughed though his crying continued.

"¿Aprende a español para mí?"

 _You learnt Spanish for me?_

Hunk nodded but spoke in English as he hugged Lance.

"You miss home. I thought this might help. You sing that song all the time so-"

Lance had nodded and squeezed Hunk back.

"My parents sing it to each other all the time. It's their song."

Lance started singing again as he cried and Hunk laughed as they sang, Lance swaying the both of them to the music so that they were dancing in their room, to the music of his childhood, of his home. Hearing it hurt so bad but it also felt good, especially with Hunk their singing it with him. He had missed his mother tongue so badly and here his best friend was, learning it for him.

That was the first night Lance had told Hunk he was like a brother.

The memory was strong and Hunk pressed it to Lance's mind, smiling as the blue paladin took hold of it and let it consume him. The rest of his memories went quiet as Hunk began rocking Lance a little and sang Besame mucho as Pidge and Keith watched in fascination. Lance seemed calmer, sighing in exhaustion as he mumbled the words of the song.

Keith had never seen Hunk so gentle. The big guy was always cuddly and liked taking care of people but this, the care he took with Lance, singing to him and making sure his every move was slow and gentle so that Lance wouldn't be jostled, it was as if Hunk was taking care of a child.

Lance looked almost happy now, his mind was quiet and he had a memory that he really liked. He lay as deadweight in Hunks arms, hands curled into his friend's shirt. It was a bond that Keith had never known, not even with Shiro. Hunk didn't just care about Lance and his team, he loved them with every piece of his heart. Keith felt his chest warm a little with that knowledge.

Hunk looked down at his best friend and brushed the hair from his eyes as he spoke low, still playing the memory in his head to Lance.

"Hey, buddy. That's a bit better huh? Can you look at me? Can you say something?"

Keith sat closer, squeezing the blue paladins hand as Lance's eyes lazily roamed over Hunks face. His gaze met Hunks for only a moment before slipping away again as he continued to mutter the words to the song.

Hunk looked a little disappointed but looked up at Keith.

"You wanna try?"

Keith wasn't sure if he could. He hadn't known Lance as long as Hunk had and whatever he showed Lance couldn't possibly compare to whatever Hunk had given him.

"You're his best friend, if it didn't work for you it won't work for me. What would I even show him?"

Hunk shifted over on the couch, preparing to hand Lance to the surprised red Paladin.

"Well, it did work a little bit. He isn't being attacked by his own mind now. Just show him whatever you want, something calm. Or just focus on what's happening now so that he knows where he is, that he's safe. Here, hold him. I know you've wanted to ever since we got him back."

Once again, Keith was amazed by how perceptive Hunk was. How could he have known? Surely, he wasn't so obvious about it. Pidge shifted closer to watch, eager to see how Keith's mind would affect Lance.

Hunk gently placed Lance's curled form in Keith's lap so that he could hold him to his chest, arm wrapped around the boys back while the other wrapped around his waist. It felt so good just to hold him, to feel the weight of him in his arms and know that he was really here, he was back.

Hunk slipped the head set off and placed it on Keith, nodding to him in encouragement.

Lances mind was loud. It was like a room full of children with all of them screaming. Thoughts and broken images fighting for attention with no way for Lance to control them. Hunks memory was the loudest, it was pushing the others back into place but without hunk it was losing focus.

Keith grunted as he flinched, one strong, unpleasant memory hitting against him. Hunk tapped his arm, voice low.

"Let him know you're there, so he can focus on you. Then talk to him and concentrate on what's happening right now. Tell him he's safe."

Keith took a breath and opened his mind to the others. It was like taking Lance's mind by the metaphorical shoulders and forcing it to stay still.

"Lance. It's me, it's Keith."

Lance blinked, hands twitching as they lay on his chest as his face screwed up in confusion.

He spoke with words as well as his mind, unsure if Lance could hear anything while his head was so scattered. He tried to keep his voice slow and calm, matching the comforting tone of Hunk's.

"You're safe, you're here in the Castle ship with team Voltron. Hunk's here and Pidge. We were all really worried about you, I'm sorry we didn't come sooner. But everything's okay now. You just have to get … better."

Looking down at Lance, watching those blue eyes blink up at the ceiling. Everything else drifted away. Keith lifted a hand from Lance's waist to pull the blanket over his chest, throwing away all embarrassment to do what he really wanted to do. He brushed a curled finger over Lance's cheek, running his hand through that hair that he'd wound them in when they'd kissed.

He focused his mind on what he felt, the weight of Lance in his arms, the way his body was pressed against him, his steady, even breaths, and guided Lance's mind into them, into the here and now.

"I'm really glad you're back, I can hardly believe it. I really missed you, more than I'd usually admit. I know you've been through a lot, and it might be a while till you're okay again but… I'm here, we all are. And you're important Lance. We could never, ever replace you. We're a family, and we love you. We'll take care of you. I promise, I won't leave. No one's ever going to hurt you again."

Lance's mind was slow and shaky but it cleared as Keith looked down at him, his voice clearing the fog and sharp thoughts so that Lance could focus. Keith's mind held Lance's and guided it into the present so that he could blink up at the boy above him.

Keith froze, hoping what he was seeing was real. Lance's eyes were tired but they were clear, he was seeing him, he was there.

"Lance? Can you hear me?"

Hunk and Pidge inched closer but Lance's blue eyes stayed transfixed on Keith's face, lips parting with a surprised breath. His hand lifted from his chest to brush his fingers across Keith's cheek, as if seeing if he was real.

"Keith?"

Just a simple word, just his name in Lance's mouth felt like every star in space had been given to him, those eyes were blinking up at him and those fingers found their way to Keith's hair and he found himself smiling as tears fell down his cheeks.

"Yeah, I'm here, you're here, you're safe. We got you back."

Lance still looked a little confused as he caught a tear with his finger.

"You saved me?"

Keith just nodded and pulled Lance closer to him, burying his face in the others neck as he cried. He thought he'd lost him. Keith rocked a little, not caring who saw this stupid gushy moment because he'd been waiting far too long for it.

Lance slowly brought his arms up to wrap around Keith, pressing his palms to that familiar red jacket as he breathed in his scent, feeling his chest heave under his hands.

"You were really that worried? I didn't think you'd come for me."

Keith pulled back, eyebrows coming down over his eyes.

"Of course, we came for you! We would never leave you! And don't ever do that again, I've had enough of you sacrificing yourself because you don't think you're important."

He pulled Lance back into his arms, holding him as tight as he could as if he never wanted to let go again. Keith could hear Hunk and Pidge sniffling as well and threw out an arm to pull them into a group hug, all wrapping themselves around their favourite blue paladin.

"You're important Lance."

Hunk sniffed against his best friend as Pidge squeezed herself into the hug.

"We love you, hermano. And if you try to give yourself up again I'm telling your Mama."

Lance let a few tears escape as he squeezed them all back. He had been doubting his worth for so long, always feeling inadequate in the face of the others skill and importance. But even when he was broken they still loved him. He pressed his face to Keith's ridiculously soft hair, smiling in the best group hug he'd ever had.

"I love you guys too."


	8. Chapter 8

Lance had been gone for so long and the team had missed him so much, now with a clearer head he greeted each one and got numerous hugs from his team. Pidge wrapped her arms around his waist in a squeeze before leaning back and beaming.

"Blue really missed you, we could hear her through the other lions, asking about you. You should go see her before she breaks through the walls and comes find you herself."

Lance had missed his lion, and honestly, he hadn't been sure she'd still be his when he got back. So, he wanted to look like a Paladin when he went to see her, so she knew he hadn't abandoned her. And that meant putting his suit back on.

But his mind was still muddled, like a jigsaw puzzle that he couldn't complete and none of the pieces fit right. Shiro had cleaned his suit and put it in his room but Lance had no idea how to put it on.

He stared at the pieces in his hands, turning them over and studying them, but he had no clue what they were for. He'd worn it a million times, he could put it on in his sleep, and yet he hadn't the faintest idea what the piece in his hands was for.

His mind was a mess, providing him with memories of long division when he tried to gain answers for his suit. He just couldn't remember. The blue paladin sat on his bed staring at the armor until he exploded with anger, throwing it against the wall in frustration.

But his anger soon turned to grief as hot tears rolled down his cheeks. He sat on his bed and sniffed, not bothering to wipe the tears until someone knocked on his door.

"Come in." His voice shook a little and he cleared his throat, attempting to collect himself before the door opened. Behind it was Keith, looking worried but trying to hide his concern.

"Hey, I heard a crash. Is everything okay?"

Lance looked to his scattered armor but couldn't come up with an excuse. Keith took his silence as a no and hesitantly came to sit beside him on his bed.

"I thought you were going to see Blue?"

Lance sniffed, hoping his eyes weren't red. "I was, I just wanted to wear my suit when I saw her."

Keith looked between Lance and the suit, face blank. "Do…you want help?"

Lance nodded quietly after a moment of silence, shoulders slumping as Keith collected the pieces and knelt in front of him. He gently took Lance's foot and pulled his shoe off, replacing it with the boot and pulling the straps tight before starting on the other. Lance watched carefully, putting the puzzle pieces back together in his head as Keith worked.

Keith's hands were nimble, gentle, they knew what they were doing. His practiced hands held Lance as he placed armor over him, guiding him where he needed to be. When his hands held Lance's waist, the blue paladin spoke, voice quiet and ashamed.

"I couldn't remember how to do it."

Keith paused in his work for only a second before he continued, eyes searching for Lance's as he shrugged.

"That's okay."

Lance shook his head as Keith's hands guided his arms up.

"No, it's not. I've done this plenty of times and I couldn't even remember which was the boot or the helmet. How am I supposed to defend the universe if I can't get dressed by myself?" His voice threatened to crack but he clenched his teeth together to hold it back. He wouldn't fall apart. Not in front of Keith.

"You were tortured, Lance. They messed with your head, it isn't your fault and you can't expect to bounce back immediately. Shiro still has bad days, he still freezes in battle sometimes. That's why we have a team. To watch each other's backs. You'll learn how to do this again. I can teach you."

His hands were circling Lance's arms, pulling straps, and snapping pieces into place, and his voice was soft but there was no pity in his eyes. He met Lance's gaze as he handed him his helmet.

"You'll get better, and we're all here to help."

Okay, so maybe he would fall apart in front of him. Lance's face crumpled and he launched himself Keith, the helmet dropping to the floor as Keith hugged him back. Both boys squeezed hard, needing the press of each other as comfort. Lance sniffed pathetically in Keith's neck but surprisingly Keith was the one who spoke first, voice uneven and strained.

"I'm really glad you're back."

"Me too." Lance felt a little more whole as Keith held him, arms strong and sure, because this was where Lance belonged. It healed a little of the hurt inside Lance's chest, where he had felt so unwanted for so long.

They broke apart and looked at each other before Lance sniffed, wiping his eyes, embarrassed.

"I'd better go see Blue. Thanks Keith."

The red paladin nodded as Lance left, only finding his voice after he disappeared out the door.

"You're welcome."

Pidge was right, Blue was excited to see her paladin. As soon as Lance came into the hanger he was greeted with the giant lion, soaring towards him with a happy roar. He may or may not have screamed.

Blue was so happy to see him she instantly melded her mind to his, her excited energy pushing against him. He could feel her thoughts, that motherly tone coming through strong.

You're back, my paladin!

"Yeah, I'm back. You didn't replace me, did you?" He laughed but Blue could sense his anxiety, and the seriousness of his thoughts.

 _I would not allow that. Nor would your team._

Her tone was stern and Lance dipped his head. Blue came closer to him, wrapping her giant metal paws around him and gently nuzzling her chin against him. As a real lion, it would have been cute, but as a robot it was more than a little terrifying.

 _You are my paladin. In all the universe, I chose you, and I don't want another._

Lance laughed, lifting a hand to pat at her chin.

"Thanks, beautiful I love you too."

 _Are you well, my pilot?_

Lance thought back to his mini melt down in his room. It wasn't one of his proudest moments.

"Uhh, I'm getting there. Or I will."

Blue hummed and searched his mind with her own, taking pieces of memories and putting them back where they belonged. She could only fix a few, ones that she had been a part of or been there for. But it helped reduce the clutter of thoughts in his mind and Lance's head was cleared of the headache he didn't know he had.

"Thanks Blue! I didn't know you could do that."

 _Our minds are connected. I will do all I can to help._

"Thanks, buddy. I really missed you."

 _I missed you too, young one._


End file.
